Who are these mystic blighters,
These weird, fantastic writers,
Who decorate your pages every week?
We know each nom de plume
From Cooktown round to Broome,
But it's inside information that we seek.
So will you kindly tell
Who "KODAK" is and "SNELL,"
And who the deuce "PHILANDER F." may be?
Who grills the morning chop
For "SATAN" and for "HOP."
Who brews "RELIGIOUS EDITOR" his tea?
You might mention, by the way,
If "O.K." is just "O.K.,"
Some anecdotes of "WANG" and "BILLY B."
And tell us if "MACHETE"
Is one of the elite,
And give us "CURSE O' MOSES" pedigree.
Of straight names there are plenty,
Such as ADAMS, MORTON, HENTY,
DYSON, H. McCRAE and ROBERT BROTHERS,
And a dozen more or so,
But it's little more we know
Of them than what we know about the others.
We should like to know what manner
Of a woman is "JOHANNA";
And is she of the brand that's known as "new"?
And if the poet BRADY
Is a man or just a lady,
And lastly, who and what and how are YOU?
First published in The Bulletin, 26 September 1912
